With darkness comes light

August has arrived, how is everyone feeling?? It got a little rough (& dark) there for a little while, didn’t it? Feels good to be rebooting back into myself again. How was this transformational period for everyone? A lot of stuff came up didn’t it; talk about rebirth!

The full moon & lunar eclipse (along with planets going retrograde, solar storms & everything else) left me exhausted and drained, in a way I haven’t experienced for quite some time. I saw (& am still seeing) synchronicities around me. In the way of animals (mostly birds, as I am in bird medicine currently), numbers, & things just aligning perfectly. I was having a huge issue with stagnant energy in my sacral (stomach). Then here comes moon goddess and says “I’ll help you with that!” I even had dreams of a boyfriend I had when I was 18. Spirit, universe and the moon all wanted to be sure that I got the message (they know it takes me awhile sometimes), and I totally did. Actually it was more like this total epiphany, & awakening unlocking everything for me. Looping themes & boundaries, were two HUGE topics for me.

I began my work with serpent energy, as she symbolizes rebirth, she helped me get energy flowing again. As soon as it started to flow I was a releasing queen. Things were coming up left & right to be let go of, released and detached from. I haven’t been in that victim state of mind in a while but there it was a part of myself still felt that way, so I got rid of all of it. I do not need the past (or baggage) to define me or who I am. Like many things the easiest stuff always goes quickly then you get to the real stuff. When you hit a certain level of depth within yourself & you had no idea that stuff was even there, that’s the challenge. That’s the test from the universe to see if you’re really wanting change as much as you say you do. I believe the universe & spirit to be a no nonsense kind of force, you either are willing to work for it or you’re not.  She is all about action, and putting the work in.

I went to depths I didn’t even know existed within me. I felt it too, my physical body was done. I took naps, which I never do, just because my body needed it. I had a list full of things I wanted to accomplish but none of it got done; it was okay though I needed the rest. It felt like my light body was advancing at such an accelerated speed that my physical body couldn’t keep up. I took the time I needed, that is such an important thing to do. When your body tells you, “Hey, I need a brake” then listen. It is okay to rest momentarily & pick everything up later. I went into my sacred space & spent a lot of time there. I withdrew from society for a little while because I needed too. For me, I cannot be social while still going deep into myself; I’t just doesn’t work for me. I spent a lot of time in nature, it called out to me. There was one day where every time I’d come home I’d be called right back outside again. I needed the love from mother, I needed her support.

And here we are now, its August & there is a magic in the air. I find myself taking the first steps into my new life & my new ways of being. I have set boundaries with myself & stand powerfully in them. I even stood up to my mother & didn’t feel bad about it (which has been a huge looping theme for me). I am in my power, & if I’m being honest, it feels amazing. I have been so proud of myself to tell the world what I will & will not accept. It’s a truly empowering feeling all on its own & once you start, you’ll only want more. I see myself spiraling out of the orbit of my old self, none of that serves me anymore. I have really just come to a place where I am sick of the reruns, the same crap that plays over & over again. I am just over it & am moving forward.  I am ready to receive everything that I have been working hard to manifest.

I am ready to walk into my new life. I am ready for everything I always knew was waiting for me. I am ready to shine, inspire & to create. I am ready for happiness, joy & love. I am ready for it all. I am ready to leave the old me behind & walk with strength, courage & love into a new chapter.

I want you to know that you can change your life, you are the master & creator of your destiny. A happy life always starts with a grateful heart. Everything you’ve ever wanted is out there waiting for you, go get it!

 

Blessings,

Xo Faye

Freely Give

I woke this morning thinking about Love and how it has made my life so valuable. How me giving love so freely has aided me, and how receiving love has only lead me to all the growth I have accomplished.

My love of hooping for instance, has shown me how beautiful I am. It has help me to build my confidence, and patience. From it, I have begun to trust myself more and more. I have never felt so good about myself, or had a healthy positive feeling about myself. It has helped me smile when I just want to cry, release from the stress of the day but most importantly of all it has helped me connect with myself. When the hoop wraps around me, I feel a surge of feminine energy that lives within me. It helps me release any and all false parts of myself and allows me to be the beautiful, fierce, goddess that I am. Hooping simply makes me come alive, more alive than I have ever been. It’s a love that I share with the hula hoop, it’s a desire to find myself, and it’s a practice that takes courage and devotion, its love in its true form. The love we carry for ourselves shapes and molds our entire lives, so if you find something (positive) that makes you feel free than never let go of it.

The love I have given to friends, family and lovers most of which have walked out of my life has changed me in the best ways. It has shown me that my love for them was never dependent upon theirs; I still hold love for them in my heart. Hoping that they find everything they are looking for in life. I no longer try to stop others when they want to leave my life, I simply let them. If our time together has come to an end than that’s how it’s meant to be. It simply means I’ve learned all that I needed to from them or they have learned all they were meant to from me. All relationships are not meant to last forever, I understand that now. I will always wear my heart on my sleeve because that is where it was always been. I will not stop giving my love freely because I do not get it in return or because others do not understand it. I love for me, and no one else. I give love freely because everyone deserves to be loved. Do to others as you’d want them to do to you. That is how I have always lived my life, and I always will. I expect nothing from you in return, my love is free. Everyone is different and I cannot expect from them as I would do, I can only control my actions and reactions.

Love is the best give you can give anyone but first you must find it for yourself. People may be hard to love, love them anyways they are the ones who need it the most. Some of us lock our hearts away, or build walls around them, love them anyway they are simply afraid. We all defend ourselves whatever way works best for us, love is the answer to every question and to every sorrow. Love is all we need and all we crave. Simply open your heart and give love to another and watch how it brightens their day. Watch how contagious love is, and how it spreads like wild fire when given the chance. We are all born with love in our hearts, it never leaves us. We simply push it down out of fear, but what happens if you let it rise. If you let love engulf every ounce of your being, wouldn’t life be so much more enjoyable.

Love is all there is, it is all that matters. It’s a universal language that everything understands and that everything is born from.

 

XOXO

Looking back

I woke up this morning thinking now that I am about to reach 30, what would I tell the younger me. It has thinking of the things I would or wouldn’t do. All the things I missed out on and the things I miss about being young. So If I were to write to my younger self, I think it might go something like this…..

Wow, we made it! Can you believe that well be 30 in just a few months. I know the idea of being 30 has always scared us, it’s the time when your official not a kid anymore. When you’re supposed to have your life together, have money, kids, and a husband. We see everything so differently than we did as a child, we have collected so much wisdom over the past years. Looking back, these are the things I would tell the 13 year old me.

Just because you’re getting older doesn’t mean you have to grow up, you don’t have to lose your creativity or imagination. You can, and will always be a child at heart.

Don’t rush going up, enjoy being young and free. You will miss it.

Be less concerned with how you feel you’re supposed to be, and be more concerned with discovering who you are.

Don’t rush into anything you aren’t ready for, when the time is right you’ll know it.

If a guy is only after you to be intimate, than he isn’t worth your time. You CANNOT change him, so don’t even try. The only person you can change is yourself.

Love and respect the reflection you see in the mirror. Others will only respect you as much as you respect yourself. No one can ever love you as much as you can love yourself. You are the only one who has to live with yourself.

Life does not need to match television, it does not need to be dramatic or full of lies and betrayal. The woman you see on television or in magazines aren’t real. They have either had plastic surgery, or been photo shopped. So stop comparing yourself to them, you are beautifully perfect just the way you are.

You cannot control how others treat you, you can only control how you treat others. Show them kindness even they don’t give that to you.

Friends will come and go, let them. The ones who were meant to stay, will always find their way back.

You will kiss a lot of guys until you find the one, but when you find him you’ll simply know.

Love should be easy, it takes work to keep a relationship together but that underlying love should always be there, and it should always come naturally. These are the relationships you should cherish the most.

You do not have to live a life of misery, if a job, person, or place makes you unhappy get rid of it. We only have so long to live, so we should live a life of happiness.

What you give, you get. Be kind, and you will have it returned. Be hateful, and you will have it returned. That is how life works, and there is no way around it.

What you think, becomes how you feel, and how you feel becomes what you do. Remember to have positive thoughts, they will comfort you when you need it the most.

Don’t judge another even if they judge you. Simply share a smile, show them love and kindness. They are the ones who need it the most.

Always be 100% yourself, and you will find everything you’ve ever needed.

But most important of all, don’t EVER give up. Even in times of darkness, there is a light that shines within us. If we’re never shown are strength, then we’ll never know what we are capable of.

 

I love you.

30 year old me