Awoke to a New

This morning I awoke feeling different in some way, like somehow overnight I was transformed into something new. I awoke not remembering my dreams; which is rather unusual for me. I knew that I slept hard because I don’t remember waking at all throughout the night, I didn’t even hear my husband wake up to leave for work.

As I lay there in bed, its like I am opening my eyes and seeing everything for the first time. Even though I have seen my room about a million times, something about the way I was seeing felt different, and new. I lay there quiet, and still. Not one thought in my mind, I only existed in the present moment. I feel at peace, light and free which was quite blissful.

There is a part of my mind that wants to get loud, who enjoys the chaos of worrying, and being fearful of everything but then there is the majority of myself that says “Okay, I am still here. Let’s take a deep breathe so we remember we are alive and that is simply brilliant.” All the worry and fear washes away with each breathe. Then I start to remember my dream, seemingly out of nowhere.

In my mind I start to see a painting with a stunning gold frame around it. As the painting gets closer and closer, I can see that it is my dream. There I was floating in mid- air, almost as if I was sleeping. There is a dark cloud coming toward me, it intends on stealing my light. Once the cloud of darkness gets close enough, it surrounds me. It reaches out to touch me, and just as it does a boom of this brilliant white light shoots out of me. Transforming the cloud of darkness into light. Erasing any ounce of darkness that once dwelled with in it.

Needless to say, I am experiencing a growth of some sort at the moment. With so many events happening in August I know it will definitely bring about many things, one of which I feel to be a HUGE shift toward the light. With the new moon (last night) in Leo, and this being the birthday of Leo’s everywhere there is much going on. I am thrilled to see what changelings and what rewards this upcoming month has in store for all of us.

I will leave you with this quote that popped in my head

“The light is where I celebrate, the darkness is where I find myself…”

 

Think about it

 

xoxo

At a standstill

We are only two days into the new month and already there is much beauty to be found. The birds are singing their songs, the flowers are blooming, there is a cool breeze blowing and the sun is shining. I feel light and free, expect for one thing…..

Today as I awaken from the night of rest I find myself feeling as if I have come to the end of the road. I have not lost my faith in the universe, or the positive energies that surround me; I simply feel I am at the end of the road I’ve created for myself. When I look down at my feet I see a blacktop road with grass and flowers growing all around it. When I look behind me I see the forest from which I came, and all that I have fought through to get here. I see all the lessons, and growth that I have done while in the forest, and my time there is complete (at least for now.) When I look in front of me I see a wide open filed, with tall grass and wild flowers blowing in a gentle breeze. I am not at a cross roads, I am at a standstill.

I am at a new beginning, this chapter has come to a close and this is where a new starts. When I look out into the open field of opportunity, I see so many paths I could take, but which is right for me, I am undecided. For now, I just rest, I feel the breeze touch my face so gentle, I smell the lovely scents of the flowers, I take a moment to see how far I have come, and what still needs to be done.

It is at the moment, when I feel lost. That my since of purpose has been lost to me and I know must regain what I once saw and felt so clearly. I must reinvent myself, or shed the skin that binds me. I have out grown so much in this life but what I have really changed in the physical world, I hang out with the same people, I do the same things, and I see the same things in my home every day. So with all the growth I have done, I have not changed my surroundings, maybe this is what the new chapter will bring.

For now, I am amazed at how far I have come and who I have become. There is always work to be done, but for now I am grateful for all the lessons the forest has taught me. Without which I wouldn’t be the woman I am today. Tomorrow is another day, and another step forward. I am excited to see what this next chapter holds for me.

 

Namaste.

xoxo

My absence

Over the past week I have been battling a illness, my sinus have been giving me a hard time. The weather has decided it is no long winter, and that spring should be here. So along with spring comes my allergies to pollen. Anyways, this isn’t what the blog is about today so let’s get it to it.

On Sunday, before I got sick my husband, dog and I went to the state forest to get away for a few hours. The thing I love the most about the forest besides all the tress is when my phone says no service. It’s a kind of liberating feeling to just be for a few hours, with no distractions.

We were walking on a trial right off the road, when we stumbled along an old P.O.W. Camp that had once been there. So we started to walk around the camp. It was fascinating to see all the buildings they had built, the aqueducts they had built to supply water to the camp, and overall just how large the camp was. The first side of the camp we encountered was not “bad” or giving off any negative energies that I could feel. It’s hard to say what these buildings were since only the foundations remain. As we kept walking I felt compelled to walk a certain direction, so I follow it and let it guide me. We ended up in a part of the camp that I did not like at all. As we were walking, I told my husband that I felt different, I felt anxiety and a heavy sadness. He then told me that I was in a building, which I hadn’t noticed. I kept waking, down this trail where there seemed to be nothing, but I knew something was at the end of it. As I walked down this trail, I began to feel like a officer in the military. I had on a green coat, it was long, down to my mid calf, I had a green hat with golden metals or some sort of engraving on the front. I had brown boots, tall brown boots. I had brown hair, and a brown mustache, I had brown gloves in my hand. As I walked I looked down at the ground, I knew what had to be done but I felt remorse and guilt for it. Then I came to the end of the path, there was the remains of a building. I hated this building, I believe some very horrific things happened in this place. It was a prime location for it, a mile away from any of the other buildings in the camp. Surrounded by nothing, no one to hear your screams. I quickly left this location, and walked back down the path as I did so this time, I felt as if two men were carrying me, one under each of my arms. I felt like I was bloody, beaten and almost on the edge of death. I quickly release what was not mine, and told the spirits they could not come home with they. That they must remain where they are meant to be.

As we walked away further and further from this location, we came to the entrance of the camp, were to the right a building used to be. I walked into the building, it felt like an administrative building, where people would be admitted into the camp. Behind where the building used to be was a ton oak trees, one of these trees called out to me so I walked over to it. I touched the tree, said “hello” and asked to exchange energy with him. I say him because oak trees are more masculine to me than other trees. He gave me his energy, and it began to ground me. I lost track of him, getting lost in how amazing this energy felt. I came back to reality and thanked the tree for what he had given me, and removed my hand. I felt high, and grounded; I could feel the bottoms of my feet connected deeply within our great mother. It was amazing to be that in a place riddled with darkness, that there would be a tree that was beautiful and light; that was never affected by this darkness. I have made a tree friend, and I will be visiting him again.

If you have never made a tree friend, I would suggest you try sometime. Trees hold much wisdom and knowledge. Humans could learn a lot from trees, they stand strong and firm where they are, they show us death is beautiful, and how important it is to have roots.

Next time I go, I will try to remember to bring my camera so I can take pictures for everyone to see.