Feel like the day

I feel a lot like the day today. Which may sounds weird, or further validate that I control the weather. Either way I am feeling just like this….I am a brilliant blue sky, hidden by passing bursts of fear, worry and sadness. There are moments when the light breaks through, and my is it wonderful. Then the clouds come around again. Its not chaotic, but rather still and very much in the moment. Present and alive. I dont worry of the clouds that mask my light, I know like everything else these clouds will too pass. Allowing me to beam at full capacity once again.

Xo20368809_10211172968734718_5246402485472228837_o

Awoke to a New

This morning I awoke feeling different in some way, like somehow overnight I was transformed into something new. I awoke not remembering my dreams; which is rather unusual for me. I knew that I slept hard because I don’t remember waking at all throughout the night, I didn’t even hear my husband wake up to leave for work.

As I lay there in bed, its like I am opening my eyes and seeing everything for the first time. Even though I have seen my room about a million times, something about the way I was seeing felt different, and new. I lay there quiet, and still. Not one thought in my mind, I only existed in the present moment. I feel at peace, light and free which was quite blissful.

There is a part of my mind that wants to get loud, who enjoys the chaos of worrying, and being fearful of everything but then there is the majority of myself that says “Okay, I am still here. Let’s take a deep breathe so we remember we are alive and that is simply brilliant.” All the worry and fear washes away with each breathe. Then I start to remember my dream, seemingly out of nowhere.

In my mind I start to see a painting with a stunning gold frame around it. As the painting gets closer and closer, I can see that it is my dream. There I was floating in mid- air, almost as if I was sleeping. There is a dark cloud coming toward me, it intends on stealing my light. Once the cloud of darkness gets close enough, it surrounds me. It reaches out to touch me, and just as it does a boom of this brilliant white light shoots out of me. Transforming the cloud of darkness into light. Erasing any ounce of darkness that once dwelled with in it.

Needless to say, I am experiencing a growth of some sort at the moment. With so many events happening in August I know it will definitely bring about many things, one of which I feel to be a HUGE shift toward the light. With the new moon (last night) in Leo, and this being the birthday of Leo’s everywhere there is much going on. I am thrilled to see what changelings and what rewards this upcoming month has in store for all of us.

I will leave you with this quote that popped in my head

“The light is where I celebrate, the darkness is where I find myself…”

 

Think about it

 

xoxo

Journey of truth

I read an article yesterday posted by a dear friend, and it got thinking about light workers; even more so than I already had. One of the biggest misconceptions about the road to enlightenment or spirituality is that it’s easy. That it is all about light and love and nothing else. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Take it from someone who has been on her journey for several years now, this choice is not easy in anyway. When you decide to strip yourself of everything you were taught or has ever happened to you, it comes and slaps you in the face; it won’t go away until you let it go. The road to enlightenment isn’t easy, if it was there would be a lot more enlightened people.

This journey, like most of value, is painful, frustrating, ugly, dark and everything in between. Venturing onto the road of enlightenment is truly venturing into the deepest, darkest parts of yourself. This is how transformation accrues; the butterfly isn’t made in the light. The caterpillar first must spend months in the darkness to find her beauty before showing it to the world.  We, humans, are no different. Light is the place of rest, gratefulness, harmony, and love. All of which cannot be appreciated without the lessons of the dark.

As with everything, there will always be people who proclaim to be light workers or enlightened but those that are light workers don’t go around bragging or even saying that they are. Everyone knows their truths, we also know the difference between lies and truths. There will ALWAYS be people who crave attention, and will say anything to get it. I, myself, believe that is very possible that I am a light worker but that isn’t a term that I really use. I simply say I work with the light, the light lives within me, it allows me to use what has been given to me. This is not something that I go around screaming from the roof tops; this is sacred to me. It is a deep part of who I am, and anyone who knows me see that. The right people know, and the others don’t matter.

I often hear “don’t feed that negativity” but negativity is natural. Yes, I do believe that you shouldn’t feed negative energy, such as seeing animals being cruelly treated or go around with negative self-talk in your mind, or complain non-stop about everything. But the point is, it is all a part of life and in being someone aligned with the light you will always experience highs and lows; it’s like a never ending cycle really.  We need to vent, and let out all the negativity. Getting it out of our bodies in a positive way is what’s important. Harboring feelings of negativity and pushing them down, or feeling wrong for having them can be far more damaging than anything else.

What people must realize is the spiritual journey is about unbecoming everything you were conditioned to be. This is why it’s challenging, and downright suck sometimes but once you do the work, the other side of that is a brilliant feeling of euphoria, peace and love. That I can guarantee.

Three kinds of people

There are three kinds of people in this life; those that learn through the mistakes of others, those that must learn for themselves, and those who never learn at all.

I am one of those people who must learn for themselves, the hard way. I could see another do the same thing as I am, and how it turns out for them but I will never get it until I experience it for myself. This could be how I have collected so much wisdom in my life. I have made the same mistakes over and over until one day it “clicks”, and I think “Okay, this isn’t working. I need to try this a different way.”

The people that it never “clicks” for are the ones that need the most uplifting. From what I’ve seen of these people there is some sort of underlying issue that causes them to never get it. They ignore the lesson, hoping that next time they will get a different result, not understanding in order to get a different result you must go about things in a different way. These are the kinds of people who I believe need to find their own way, others cannot help them. Only using the help of others against them, or as a another way to be the victim. These are the kinds of people I give up on, not because I want to but because they are so draining that it isn’t worth it. The only way they can be helped is for them to hit rock bottom and find their own way.  Trust me, I feel as awful saying that  but it is the only way (I have learned) to deal with those kinds of people.

As for the people who learn from others, you are the whole reasons I started to write. The reason why I get so personal, and share my experiences. I admire those of you can see someone else going down the wrong path and avoid it all together. I hope that I have helped all of you on your journey of expanding and growing. I will continue to share my hard times, and short comings with you.

Remember to never let anyone, no matter who they are, drain the energy from you. We all need boundaries, set them and never allow someone to cross the lines you’ve set. It’s your energy, be selective and careful who you share it with.

 

Xo

 

Weekend Fun

The past few days have been a whorl wind of activity for me. Over the past weekend my husband and I had east coast rally x nationals; which my father and mother-in law joined us for. Sunday was the full moon, and yesterday was my husband’s 30th birthday. So needless to say, I have been catching up on everything from sleep to laundry.

Rally X was fun as always, I enjoy taking the photos for the event. As it is a way for me to share the experience with my husband and I just have a blast. I love watching each driver’s different approach to the course, and how different each car is. Everyone, for the most part, is nice and pleasant to talk to. I do love meeting new people, especially those different from who I’d normally meet. Every time my husband goes up to race I send him all the positive energy, and reiki I can, I like to think it helps even if it doesn’t. haha.

People were getting to me so much over the course of this trip and instead of running my mouth, like I normally would, I decided to take a different approach. I got quite, and went inside my head. Taking some deep breathes, thinking “This is happening for a reason, there is a lesson to learn here. What is the lesson?” Most of the time the answer I came up with was Patience. Not to take the negative energy given to me, and make it my own, only to spew more negativity. Instead, I did not accept the negativity given to me, and took the high road. Releasing what is not mine, so that I could be at peace.

On the way home Sunday, I noticed all that this trip has shown and taught me. I noticed how far I have come in my own growth and expansion. The old me would have complained about everything, being muddy, dirty, hot, and tired. Basically everything and anything that could be complained about, I would have complained about it. This time that was the role of my mother-in law. She showed me just how annoying I used to be, how needy I was and how I had the insistent need to control every aspect of everything. Rather than complain, I said “I need to eat soon” or “I could use a break from the sun.” It sends the message of what I need without annoying and draining everyone.

I noticed that complaining over every little thing is so draining, and kills the overall vibe. Sometimes we try so hard to be part of something, that we over try and overdo it. Which makes everyone not want to around you, and creates more distance. This is how it was for most of us; we all have our own routines and go our own ways that we do not need to told what to do. Even though she made things difficult, we still managed to have a lot of fun and meet new people. It just makes me so thankful and grateful that I am no longer that way. I am now able to relax, and go with the flow.

The full moon was much needed for me, we got home just in time for me to do my full moon ritual. Since I had missed the past two, I was in desperate need of this moon. When I dumped sage into my pot, I must have dumped a lot in, as it didn’t take long for the garage to completely fill with smoke. As I cleansed myself, I felt everything lift off of me. You never know the weight you carry until it’s gone, that’s for sure.  As the sage engulfed my entire being I felt a tingling on my back, right above my heart charka.  I asked some friends about this and was told it was the Higher Heart Charka. Since then I have been reading as much as I can about this charka, as it is a new charka to humanity. It is completely fascinating to me.

Since the full moon, and everything that has happened over the weekend, I am more thankful than ever for how far I have come, and all the changes I have made along the way.

We always have the potential to be better, it is up to use to choose to be.

Journal Talk

An excerpt from my journal:

We are meant to live simply within the trees and confines of nature. I don’t know why we cannot be a modern civilization and still live amongst the stars, wild and free.  Keeping all the trees and water natural, as they were intended to be; keeping all the beauty our great mother has given us and shown us. Why can’t we keep building small and the roads of grass or moss? Keeping communities small and orderly, we would have no need for cars or trucks. Everything that we needed would be there for us in our community; with everyone having a job working hard to survive and for happiness. This is my dream for myself, and all of us. Braking down the big cities that confine us, that feed the darkness and remembering what it is to live simply, and slowly. No being ruled by a clock, stress, worry, fear or money.

No one person is meant to hold power over all of us, and no person is meant to hold all the money of the world for himself. The time is upon us, the time of darkness is quickly approaching us. It will be the time of extreme violence to all who oppose the darkness. This must happen, it will be the last bit of darkness on this earth that needs to be cleared so that we can find peace on earth. The lightworkers on earth will be ready and waiting to rebuild when the time is right. We must live in darkness to find our way to the light. We must let the darkness transform us, and change us so that we can find the light. For all things need their time in the dark, it is where transformation happens.

Humanity will find its way, it is only a matter of time. Until then we can all do our part of self-care and love. So within, so without. Once we understand we create the world around us, everything will change.

For me all I can do is give energy to the things I love and am passionate about. I see the future I want for myself and I will not stop until it becomes my reality.

Xo

Namaste