Blocking yourself

On Wednesday I did another past life regression; the intent of this regression was to find when my fear originated and why I have associated it with fear. When my friend and I began the regression, I laid down and began to relax. I slowly became more and more relax until I just got to the state of stillness. I began to walk over the bridge of time; I then stepped off the bridge and into a past life. It is normally at this point where I began to see my surroundings, my body, and other people. This time was unlike all the other regression’s I had previous; I saw complete darkness. I thought to myself that perhaps I was blind in this life. My friend was asking me questions of where I was, what year is it, what’s my family name, are you male or female, young or old? All of which I had no answers too. As I lay in the darkness that now surrounded me; my stomach began to tense up. It was now filled with anxiousness, and fearfulness. I then began to feel things touching me, of which I am still unsure. It was at the point where I felt my physical body begin to twitch and react to me being touched. Along with not being able to see anything, I also did not hear anything.

A few moments later she had asked me “You will always…what?” To which my response was “I will always be afraid”. As I heard my mind say this to me, it was said with such forcefulness, and authority. As I had no choice in the matter, I had already made my choice. I do not feel this way anymore, the saying has now changed to “I will no longer be afraid”. I feel as if I’m playing tug of war with myself. As I let go and release my ego pulls me back to these fears. Telling me that I need them, know full well I do not.

She then moved in forward in time, to my death. I do not remember how I died in this life as it must have been of little significance. As I left that body, and began to float above it is when I saw an image; which now has a permit place in my mind.  I saw a muddy ground; it must have rained recently or was raining. There was no sun shining, it was cloudy and gray. There were horse prints imprinted into the mud which the rain water had collected in.  I was kneeling, one leg bend in the mud the other my foot in the mud. Both my hands were in the mud and my head was down. My skin was white, so white in fact it looked as if I had never seen the sun. I had no hair on my head, and saw only a small brown cloth covering my private area (which made me believe I was a man in this life). I did not see my face however; I did notice that I had an iron collar around my neck. It was thick, and had loops where a chain could be attached. I also received no emotion linked to the image.

After I received this image she asked me “Think of your soul contracts, did you a share this life with another in your present life?” Yes, I thought. My friend that was doing the regression was the only one that came to mind. She then asked “What was my purpose of this life?” To which I said to myself “To give others hope when there is none”.

She then pulled me back to my physical body; I just laid there for a few seconds. Thinking back on all the knowledge I didn’t receive and the little that I did. I told her that I had no answers for her, and all I saw was this one image. She had told me that as we were doing the regression, she knew I wasn’t getting to the root. That somethings we carry with us so long that they take root in us and become so deep it takes many regressions to rid them from ourselves. That we block ourselves from revisiting this impactful moments in our souls evolution.  This is what is happening to me, I believe. I do believe I have been carrying this me for quite a long time and it is only now that I am fully ready to get rid of them. It will just take more work than I may have fully realized. So I will continue on this path until I have fulfilled all that I need to. The hardest path is the one that reaps the most rewards.

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